[sumo] Fwd: Could a sumo wrestler play goalie?
Jeff A
jpaitv at gmail.com
Tue Sep 22 21:02:14 EDT 2026
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Gaijingai
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It might have been.
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---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: The Athletic Hockey <TheAthletic at e1.theathletic.com>
Date: Tue, Sep 22, 2026 at 10:39 AM
Subject: Could a sumo wrestler play goalie?
To: Jeffrey <jpaitv at gmail.com>
Plus: Prediction contest sneak peek.
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[image: Hockey Newsletter]
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<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/d02b4734db1c4f5c89c55f8bbb5eb860/bf4f3127628a4ed8ba841355b4e35207>
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[image: Sean McIndoe]
*By Sean McIndoe
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/d02b4734db1c4f5c89c55f8bbb5eb860/3ae325c8482c4ec1aaba00180039a13b>*
Good morning to everyone except people who occasionally catch themselves
calling the NHL exhibition season "spring training." In other words, me. I
do that. Somebody, please help me.
We're officially one week away
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/d02b4734db1c4f5c89c55f8bbb5eb860/70a8f69a936e4ff29d2efd8cb20d584c>
from meaningful NHL hockey. Here's what you need to know.
*Modeling*
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/1f7c83d517aa4b63815613be805a2eca>
Joe Hrycych / Getty Images
*Projections march on*
We've reached the halfway point of *The Athletic*'s NHL season projections.
Do you know where your favorite team is?
Hopefully not. After all, these previews are released in reverse order of
the forecast standings, starting with the lowly *Vancouver Canucks*
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/bf5029230e524931835dd49ab8e6db20>
and working up to the actual contenders. If you haven't seen your team yet,
that's good news.
The 16 teams
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/b44b6d10c34c42ab85a2a5dc89289060>
revealed so far don't include any true shockers, though there were some
surprises. Three playoff teams from last season are projected for under 90
points this year, including the *Anaheim Ducks* (who won a round), the *Boston
Bruins* (who had 100 points) and the *Pittsburgh Penguins* (who have Sidney
Crosby).
On the flip side, we haven't seen teams such as the *Ottawa Senators*
or *Columbus
Blue Jackets* yet, despite their drama-filled offseasons
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/a0bc97274c69480fa7d0835c17d14d30>.
The *Philadelphia Flyers* haven't appeared yet either, meaning the model
believes last year wasn't a fluke. The *New Jersey Devils* aren't on the
list yet either, despite putting up a meager 87 points last season and
trading their starting goalie in the offseason.
Out west, there are fewer surprises; with the *Winnipeg Jets* appearing in
today's list, all eight teams that missed the playoffs in the Western
Conference last year have already made their appearance. The model is
pessimistic about the West in general, with all four of the worst teams and
six of the bottom seven being from the conference.
None of this will matter much once the season starts and we start seeing
games that count. But for now, it's a great chance to calibrate those
expectations. If you can't get enough of season lookaheads, I'll have my
annual four-division dive into the entire league later in the week. Here's
hoping you won't have seen your team show up on the big list
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/7eacce64c68f417fb977607ed1be632b>
yet by then.
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/d2d346a308c64c9e85df276f85ef1b70>
Bruce Bennett / Getty Images
*Tomorrow, it's your turn*
Speaking of content that's on its way, the *annual prediction contest* is
set to publish tomorrow morning. It will be similar to last year's contest,
so you can get a refresher on how it all works by looking back at that one
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/824abf641eef43f7b7ada2e9c050d5b1>
.
That makes today a good day to start working on your entry. *You'll just
need up to five teams you feel sure will make the playoffs, and up to five
more that won't.* Figure out your awards favorites, hit the books on those
rookies and start putting together your list of guys who'll definitely get
traded.
And of course, there's always the dreaded *bonus question*, which gives you
the chance to risk your entire score on the added points that could put
your entry over the top. That question changes every year, and as a special
thank you to Red Light subscribers, I'm revealing it for you here a day
early:
*Name one player who will score at least 50 goals this year.*
That's it. No qualifiers or exceptions, for the first time in contest
history. Of course, only two players in the entire league managed to hit
the 50-goal mark last year, and neither was a usual suspect like Connor
McDavid, Leon Draisaitl or Auston Matthews.
*Do you have the nerve to offer up an answer? Will there even be a right
answer this year?* It's not an easy choice to make, but your good taste in
newsletters means that at least now you've got an extra 24 hours to make it.
To enter the contest, visit our NHL page
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/7e38e0fc3969441f93f238534abab9d9>
(or my author page
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/d5183b288e0a40e196c2cb6b086a54e8>)
tomorrow around 9 a.m. ET and leave your entry in the comments section of
the post.
*💡 Trivia Time!*
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/f8ee773972b44499aaf67ea973ec3b04>
Ethan Miller / Getty Images
On the subject of 50-goal scorers or lack thereof, we should point out that
it's rare but not unheard of for the NHL to go a full season without a
single 50-goal scorer. It happened in the two Covid-shortened seasons, as
well as the 2013 lockout year. But those weren't the only times.
So, for today's question: *Can you name all of the players who've won the
"Rocket" Richard Trophy without scoring 50 goals in that season?*
- *A few hints: *First, remember that the Rocket, given annually to the
league's top regular-season goal scorer, has existed as an award only since
1999, so you don't need to go too far back. And there's at least one player
who appears on the list multiple times, and at least one season with
multiple winners due to a tie.
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/c887d412e7a8426cb1f2798257ec50a8>
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/45cf7bf8beb342a48db204111e19289c/522bed37e6f54dc9b96057759660c650>
*Coast to Coast*
🏋️ The new NHL CBA bans fitness tests at training camp, and not everyone
is thrilled
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/49b58b9fa42f41aaa08082f66bf4bac8>
about it.
🧳 You've heard a lot about this new era of players forcing trades. But is
it all that new? I built an All-Star team of players who said "get me out
of here."
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/50769548f0e447debe6a62eab999c27e>
🤑 Shayna Goldman has a contract vibe check
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/e9bce45421e149d6941a79f6a224dce6>
after a wild summer of spending.
🐱 Aleksander Barkov's long road: Julian McKenzie talks to the Panthers
captain about his rehab and return from knee surgery. Good read
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/34a20f6482a34aafb950640e2258cd5b>
.
🦈 Expectations are much higher in San Jose this year. Is that good? And how
are the Sharks dealing with it
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/daffb59b58594b9e8b26f166c12d3be6>
?
🎙️ On Monday's "The Athletic Hockey Show" podcast, it's Max Bultman and
Mark Lazerus on the ongoing issues for the Blue Jackets, with Kirill
Marchenko refusing to commit long-term and Adam Fantilli unsigned and
absent from camp. Plus: Who really holds the power in today's NHL after a
seemingly unprecedented offseason? Watch or listen here
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/5190431a2b5a47c8922d558db239e9a4>
.
*No Dumb Questions*
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Maddie Meyer / Getty Images
*We believe that in hockey, as in life, there are no dumb questions. So, if
you have something you've always wondered about the sport, ask away by
emailing us at redlight at theathletic.com
<redlight at theathletic.com?subject=No+Dumb+Questions>.*
I teased this one last week, calling it "the single most common (and almost
certainly most ridiculous) question" this feature receives. Some of you may
have figured out what it would be. Either way, it's finally time to take it
on.
*The sumo goalie question*
*Are there any physical restrictions (height, weight) on the goalie
position? If not, why has no team thought to sign a sumo wrestler and just
plant them in goal? — Bill P.*
Ah yes, the idea of finding the widest athlete possible, putting him on
skates and wedging him into the net with instructions not to move. This is
one of those ideas I'm pretty sure every hockey fan has come up with at
some point, right up there with "tell all six players to just lay in a
stack in the crease to block the whole net." It's ludicrous. It's also kind
of intriguing.
But would it work?
First things first: *No, nothing in the rulebook limits the size of a
goalie.* (Their equipment, yes, but not the goalie themselves.) With that
said, I can think of three main problems with the sumo goalie plan:
*1. The measurements don't quite work:* Let's start with the basics. An NHL
net is four feet high by six feet wide. As you may have noticed, most
people are not. That includes the world's biggest sumo wrestlers, though
they come closer than most. One wrestler, who's billed as "the widest sumo
in the world," claims to be 70 inches wide
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/bd4fc502b7ee4054bc58417b143eb50d>.
Even if we take his marketing team at its word, that still leaves us two
inches short of covering the whole net.
And of course, that guy is much more round than rectangular, meaning the
gaps get bigger in the corners — which is a problem, because ...
*2. Today's snipers would pick them apart:* Maybe the sumo plan would have
worked at some point in hockey history, when players would focus on
shooting as hard as they could while hoping the puck found an opening
somewhere. But today's stars? Give an Alex Ovechkin or Auston Matthews or
Connor Bedard even a few inches to shoot at, knowing the goalie wouldn't
move much to react to their shot, and they'd light him up.
Put it this way: When a TV show tested the sumo idea
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/175ae5130ad74f1d9927c88e440759e6>
many years ago, it brought in an NHL player and found that he had an easy
time scoring. The name of that offensive dynamo? George Parros. Yeah, I'm
guessing Draisaitl would be able to find the net once or twice:
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/z/c/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/88152972484a421188961bce41349973>
*3. Modern goalies do more than stop pucks:* Granted, that's their main
job. But let's imagine we found a willing sumo wrestler and taught him to
skate just well enough to get from the bench to the crease and back for
each period with some help, wedged him in the net and told him to stay put.
That means no playing the puck on shoot-ins, which is a key part of every
team's defensive-zone structure these days. No quick passes back up ice on
the power play. You couldn't pull him for an extra attacker on a delayed
penalty or late-game situation. And it's fair to assume rebound control
would be a weakness.
*Those aren't the only issues; I didn't even get into how you'd actually
find someone willing to do this. *("Hey man, I know you're a famous and
highly respected athlete, but would you want to quit that job to get hit by
vulcanized rubber going 100 mph for three hours a night? You may need to
take a pay cut. *Hello?* Weird, I think we got disconnected.") But, as
athletic as sumo wrestlers are, we can safely conclude the idea wouldn't
work. At least not in today's game.
Could it work someday? Never say never — I'm old enough to remember a time
when we thought it was an immutable rule of physics that goalies couldn't
be over 6 feet tall, and now they're all either lumbering giants or Juuse
Saros. Maybe we see the same thing happen with width.
But I'm not banking on it. And now you know why you shouldn't either.
*Trivia Answer*
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/da4d9d135708480299999654ec739994>
Jeff Vinnick / Getty Images
*Eight players have won the Rocket Richard Trophy without scoring 50 goals,
including one who did it three times.*
They are:
- *Teemu Selanne* in 1999 (47 goals)
- *Rick Nash, Jarome Iginla *(pictured above) and* Ilya Kovalchuk* in
2004 (three-way tie, 41 goals each)
- *Alex Ovechkin* in 2013 (32 goals in a 48-game season)
- *Sidney Crosby* in 2017 (44 goals)
- *Ovechkin* in 2018 (49 goals)
- *Ovechkin* and *David Pastrňák* in 2020 (48 goals each in a
70-ish-game season)
- *Auston Matthews* in 2021 (41 goals in a 56-game season)
*Most clicked in Friday's newsletter:* Why the Winnipeg Jets can’t afford
to make an example of Connor Hellebuyck
<https://links.e1.nytimes.com/a/zc/5037/40d112a5d6ba4f799c4c41e68233acb5/983d27bafece4371b6ea002241585a04>
.
*📫 Love Red Light?* Check out *The Athletic*'s other newsletters
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.
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