[sumo] (no subject)
jdouglas at nyc.rr.com
jdouglas at nyc.rr.com
Tue Mar 3 11:05:57 EST 2009
Who's giving the talks?
I believe I am. Huzayomama. Just waiting for someone to guarantee my accommodations. JAL, NHK and Bandai have declined, citing the economic crisis.(as if) I am in serious discussion with Kobayashi, the very successful manufacturers of the world-marketed "miracle" toilet deodorizer drops.
We'll be discussing things NEVER before seen or discussed in the hidden world of sumo.
My facts may not be scholarly, and they may be oddly infused with my stilted world-political views, however they will be delivered with certainty, passion and drama. I will attempt to tie the influence of the 47 Ronin with the arrival of the Haiwiain rikishi, world war II and Akira Kurosawa while using a sci-fi portal maneuver and utilizing my 30 person gospel choir. (hopefully they can be put up at a youth hostel, even though the youngest member is in his 60's). I may also SEEM to totally confuse the facts, especially when it comes to history as well as skewing the statistics so they favor the rikishi I admire and to whom I am partial and find attractive. I'm a scientist. Forget statistics. Everyone knows that 78.2% of all statistics are fabricated.
As a result of the profound influence on me by my great-aunt Oona O'Malley, late of Galway Co. I will be embellishing my lectures, favoring rikishi with thick, lustrous mage, small hands and an ironic senses of humor snd fast, aggressive moves. My aunt was a frustrated expelled nun who loved Asian cultural and religious ritual along with bare-fisted boxing. Had she been exposed to Mongolian wrestling or SUMO the history of the western world may have taken a more favorable direction.
I will show her original power point presentation from 1937. I am in the process of digitizing it and removing the dried animal matter on the surface.
There will be supplemental lectures on the strange marriage of Yakuza and Kabuki, showing the powerful forces that brought them together, and the dark, shameful secret they share with bunraku. For this one, children under 18 will NOT be admitted.
More: Kuchi-e in the Mejii era,(usually sold out) and the Shinto influence on pachinko parlors and Korean barbeque- but from the perspective of a Catholic Maryknoll Missionary with a penchant for brilliant anthropological forensic investigation. Gotta love Aunt Oona.
The featured talk will discuss the role of the CIA/Secret Service in promoting the entry of gaijin into mainline sumo will be touched upon as well. That lecture will be broadcast from an undisclosed location at a date and time yet to be determined and never to be disclosed. It will be voiced-over by a digitized replication of Ross Mihara. Ross has great credibility in the topsy-turvy world of "what's going on with that sumo over there in Japan?"
A great time COULD be had by all.
Jeez. If this doesn't work out, then I guess I'll just have to enjoy the Basho in two weeks and cut down on the rich fantasy life while waiting impatiently. Oh yeah - and keep my day job.
Yours in sumo,
---- mbtatton at aol.com wrote:
> Who's giving the talks?
> On 2009/03/02, at 17:53, mbtatton at aol.com wrote:
> > In late April, three , maybe four private gyms and perhaps a university
> > / cross cultural UK-Japan group will see talks given on sumo in
> > various spots around the UK.
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