[sumo] Hanamichi Report

[Jeffrey Anderson]

Ross Mihara: Here's Riyo Ohta with a hanamichi report. This one's with Gaijingai.

Riyo: Gaijingai, fantastic basho!

Gaijingai: Thank you very much.

Riyo: You shared the yusho in the ISP! Omedeto!

Gaijingai: I did my best.

Riyo: You also got jun-yusho in Bench Sumo and the GISP.

Gaijingai: I did not do my best.

Riyo: You also got 12-3 records in the Hoshitori Contest and the Upside Down Hoshitori Contest and promotion to Ozeki East in both! Wow! Five contests, five tremendous results! To what do we owe your success?

Gaijingai: Er - spyware installed on Doitsuyama's computer?

Riyo: Anoooooo....

Gaijingai: Well, Riyo, all this was nothing short of a miracle. You know how badly my sumo has been the last several bashos.

Riyo: Oh boy, do we ever! I mean - tell us about it.

Gaijingai: I was so depressed that I called one of those 1-800 telephone numbers for counseling and ended up reaching a call center in Pakistan.

Riyo: And what did they counsel?

Gaijingai: I told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked me if I could drive a truck.

Riyo:  Eeek! Ethnocentrism! Ethnocentrism! Back to you, Ross!

Best regards,
Jeffrey Anderson
Gaijingai - Foreign Ruler of the Dohyo

For of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these:
It might have been. - John Greenleaf Whittier