[sumo] Sumo World magazine, January 2008 edition

[Harold E. Shaver]

Actually, I believe, you only have to change the first word of the Ichinoya
sentence to have it make perfect sense.  Change "Until" into "Unlike" and it
falls right into place.

Hal "Chisaiyama" Shaver
極小山
-----Original Message-----
From: Magnus Berg [mailto:magnus.rie at comhem.se] 
Sent: Friday, February 01, 2008 8:42 AM
To: Sumo Mailing List
Subject: Re: [sumo] Sumo World magazine, January 2008 edition

Thanks Jezz, for the best laugh I've had all week! After all these 
years, I can finally forgive Clyde Newton for owing me tens of dollars, 
and that's thanks to you. My favorite was the Ichinoya sentence. I read 
it four times and still don't understand how the parts are even 
remotely related!

I miss the eek, too! Let's hope they still can 'eek' out the odd eek in 
coming (?) issues...

All the best,
Maguroyama

2008-02-01 kl. 16.41 skrev Jezz:

> Hi!
>
> I have just received a copy of Sumo World for the past basho (thanks
> to John Gunning, aka Nishinoshima).  I am amongst the many that are
> owed copies due to a subscription made way back.  Despite that, I
> really like Sumo World.  This issue has some interesting articles,
> including one on Ichinoya, and another on other 'old rikishi' in the
> past.
>
> However, Sumo World is never fully proof-read.  Sometimes the writers
> get 'flowery' with their language, which can be comedic if taken
> literally.
>
> Below are some examples of the above from this issue (there are 
> others).
>
> Page 2:    Yokozuna Hakuho performs the dohyo on the 15th day of the
> Kyusho Basho.  [Basically, he just lies down spreading himself out,
> and lets a yobidashi paint two white lines on his back.]
>
> Page 2:  Subscribers are strongly recommended to send cash by
> registered mail (dollars or yen) or by international postal order.
> This saves time and money both for Sumo World and subscribers.  [No
> mention of receiving magazines in return. There be the catch ;-)]
>
> Page 3:  Hakuho - He should have little difficulty winning 11 or 12
> bouts, but will is not likely to go beyond runner-up status unless
> Asashoryu falters.  [Hakuho changed his shikona, as he is a big fan of
> Shakespeare.]
>
> Page 4:  Kotooshu - he is likely to hold his rank with 8 or 9 wins
> [I'd go far as saying 'guaranteed to hold his rank with 8 or 9 wins'.]
>
> Page 4:  Kotoshogiku - ....with a credible 9-6 record in November....
> [Why would anyone not believe this?] ....that included an opening day
> upset over Asashoryu.  [Aha!  Now I see why.  I personally find this
> record incredible, as Asashoryu was in Mongolia at the time.]
>
> Page 7:  Wakanoho - He needs to avoid....winning by unorthodox
> methods.  [Yes, if he is on the brink of winning by such a method, he
> should immediately fall flat on his face, just in case.]
>
> Page 16:  Until many other veteran rikishi in the lower divisions, who
> specialize in preparing chanko for their heya, Ichinoya, whose hair
> was starting to turn gray , continued training seriously until the end
> of his career.  [Run that by me again...]
>
> Page 17: Ex-Kiyokuni had a long string of misfortunes after his wife
> and children were killed in a plane crash in 1985, and as a result
> only two low ranked rikishi remained at the end of his tenure.  [The
> misfortunes only began *after* his family were killed?]  Wakafuji
> Oyakata, then 64 years old and close to retirement himself, took over
> the heya briefly, but closed it down and transferred the remaining
> personnel to Kiriyama Beya and other heya after the January 2007
> tournament.  [I suppose the heya could have had a gyoji or a tokoyama,
> but basically the 'remaining personnel' can only be the two
> aforementioned rikishi.  So one went to Kiriyama Beya, and the other
> one didn't?]
>
> Page 19:  Shinnyumaku Profile Ichihara.  Hobby: Cleaning.  [Not a
> proof-reading error, but it still makes me laugh thinking about it.]
> If he develops more speed in his sumo, he has the potential to be one
> of the most promising young Japanese rikishi.   [So if he gets
> speedier, he can *potentially* become *promising*?]
>
> Page 20:  If [Ichihara] watches his weight, is high [sic] likely to be
> a sanyaku regular in the coming years.  [I thought it was his speed
> (see above) that was the issue, not his weight.  No doubt he will now
> be joining Weight-watchers.]
>
> Page 20:   Tochi[nohana] told scribes after his last bout....  [My
> Collins dictionary has three definitions for 'scribe'.  1.  a person
> who copies documents.  2.  a clerk or public copyist. 3. a teacher of
> the Jewish Law.  *Note: It is not a synonym for journalist.*  I
> suspect a party of rabbis were in attendance at the kokugikan that
> day.]
>
> Page 23:  For the first time in the history of sumo, the two head
> tokoyama were listed on the January 2008 banzuke.  [The tokoyama who
> cut the hair on other parts of the rikishi bodies will have to wait to
> be listed.]
>
> Page 24:  slighty paunchy Asashoryu [Asashoryu is slightly paunchy?]
>
> Page 24:  Farther down the ranks, Sekiwake Ama might be THE rikishi
> for 2008, if he can put on some weight and not get the odd loss to
> lower rankers.  [Beating the top-rankers is a given?  Or is
> unnecessary if he wants to become THE rikishi?]  He has the fire and
> technique, but occasionally falls asleep.  [Most rikishi suffer from
> insomnia.]
>
> Page 24:  With about 30 heya represented in the top division, there is
> no telling who will be hoisting [to hoist = to raise or lift up,
> usually by mechanical means] the heavy metal at the end.  My bet is on
> Asashoryu, assuming he is in fighting condition.  [I like that
> proviso.]
>
> Page 25:  [Kotomitsuki] humilated Hakuho in the final bout of the
> tournament.  [Well he beat him, but was Hakuho humilated by Mickey?]
>
> Page 25:  Ozeki Chiyotaikai....suddenly came to life.... [Thanks to Dr
> Frankenstein?]
>
> Page 29:  Hoshihikari:  While still a beanpole at a paltry 111
> kilograms.... [beanpole?  paltry?  111 kgs?]
>
> Page 30:  Kitazakura got off to a good start in November, but seemed
> to loose [sic] steam in the last week....  [That steam needed to be
> released!]
>
> Spot the eek!  When I was living in Japan, and bought Sumo World every
> basho, there was always at least one 'eek' in every issue.  Sadly,
> this issue of Sumo World seemed to be eek free.
>
> Finally, my favourite from this issue....
>
> Page 24: Baruto...  But barring an unfortunate accident on the dohyo,
> he could be in the mix on day 15.  [Otherwise, he could literally be
> 'in the cr*p'?]
>
> That's it!
>
> Jejima
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